I spent eight years in conversion therapy trying to heal what church leaders called my “core wounds.” I did individual therapy with Christian psychologists who claimed they could help me change my sexual orientation. I went to conferences and retreats hosted by Exodus International, the largest conversion therapy organization of its time. I deepened my faith and built a career in full-time church work. I did everything I was told to do, but my sexual orientation never changed. When I finally dropped out of conversion therapy, I walked away carrying anxiety, depression, religious trauma, and a substance abuse problem I had to fight my way out of.Today, the promise that drew me into those rooms—that I could pray the gay away—is being made in different words. One group driving this shift calls itself the CHANGED Movement. Its website offers “A New Way Forward For LGBTQ+” and promises freedom for people who want to leave an LGBTQ+ identity behind. It says accepting an LGBTQ+ identity locks a person into “a life of unhealed trauma.”I know that idea well. In conversion therapy, I was taught that my sexual orientation was evidence of something wounded inside me, and that if I did enough w...
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